For Old Times Sake

You remind me of my favorite song from high schoolThe one I swore would be played at my wedding someday

Everyone claimed that it was a phase

And well they were right

I stopped listening to that song years ago

Just as the memories have now faded into distant sonnets of what used to be

I could still remember every word if only someone would play it

But it will never be the same
I used to look at you and see the future

Filled with explosions of laughter

And calm kisses that turned pretty pink

And those cliche rainy days where we’d stay inside the house wasting time with absolutely nothing

But also everything

And most importantly each other 

But honestly I never have really liked the rain for the way it made the days seem lonely

but I’d hoped that maybe we could change that
You grew lonely

I only heard from you when the silence was so deafening that you could no longer hear your thoughts

I’ve always wondered why I was the cure to your problems

You were never too sure if I was enough to hold onto

But also never willing to let go of what could be

You weren’t always the best at making decisions

And I always did tell you that I wouldn’t chase after you
But it never stopped me
I ran
Ran hard

But running was never in my field of expertise 

And you always bragged about how many miles you could go on end

In the end

I couldn’t keep up

I didn’t know we weren’t on the same track

You were a train

Close enough to encounter

But too far to embrace

And I was simply a cable car

Hitched on when convenient
I grew tired

Of empty promises 

Kind of like the piggy bank I could never quite keep full when I was little

You would cash me in like the pennies, nickels, and dimes I had as a child

Basically worthless but enough to satisfy any adolescent heart

Too naive to understand value

I don’t think either of us ever really valued anything when it came to each other 
You were a maze to me

Finding pleasure in your pathways

But getting lost all along the way

And never truly discovering the finish line

 

And I was a puzzle to you

Only being pieced together when you had time to fit a part of the picture together

But never fully invested

I sat on your kitchen table for years before we both realized that this stagnant game of figuring each other out had to end
Just like that song
It was never meant to play forever

But it had a place

And a time

And a season

That already fulfilled its purpose

And I think I found some kind of comfort within your melody

And you say inside my lyrics to hide from your fear of change
All along I knew that for you I was just a noise that filled in your background when the loneliness set in

And for me you were someone to try to love through my own insecurities

Both perverted intentions of what a love story is supposed to be
And sometimes I still miss you

So I’ll put on that age old song and sing every word by heart

But almost as soon as it plays

It ends

And by now it’s been weeks since I’ve thought about you

Until today that is 
But I hope that someday when you think about me you’ll smile and you’ll hum our melody once more for old times sake

And I hope someday I’ll remember only the lyrics that brought love to life within these ears

Because after all I do believe at some point our season made sense

And it’s a funny thing how time never stops where we most want it to
But
My friend

My sweet melody

You may be a memory

But I think that you’re for keeping

Even long after the song has stopped playing

I hope someday

We’ll both find just exactly what it was we were looking for